To The One Trying to Figure Out Who They Are

I often write about purpose and contentment. I frequently encourage others with these two things, because if I’m being completely honest, these are two things I struggle with the most.

And even though I know my words are true, sometimes when they sit in my mind, they get jumbled. They can get tangled in with lies and doubt and discontent. Maybe you can relate. Maybe you need these reminders for yourself too.

I oftentimes question whether or not I’m giving enough or doing the right thing or if I truly am who God intended me to be. As a result, I can find myself discontented.

In other words, I put a lot of pressure on myself. And I can fuss about the small stuff. Sometimes the smallest of details that don’t work out in my favor make me feel like I myself am a failure as a result. Ultimately, I know they’re lies, but somehow, these thoughts find their way to my mind.

So today, I wanted to replace truth and joy where there is fear and discontent. Because just like I can get lost in that jumble of thoughts and the loud voices of the world, I’m sure you can too. 

I think I’ve told this story before, but one night I came home from work just drained, exhausted, and sort of hopeless. I told myself on the drive home that I was going to keep it together, but as soon as Tyler asked about my day, the tears started flowing:

“I don’t know what God wants for my life!” I said as I pounded my fist on the couch. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing or where He wants me. I don’t know my purpose. I don’t know what He’s calling me to.”

Then he said the words I really didn’t feel like hearing: 

“Get in the Word.”

Ephesians was on my heart for some reason, so later that night, I laid in bed and opened up the Word. A sentence was underlined in Ephesians, and this is what I read:

“It’s in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for.”

I was shocked. Something so simple, yet so difficult to surrender to.

I wanted to share that story again, because I think it’s powerful, and it reminds us that we can search our whole lives trying to figure out who we are and attempt to find all the answers. But ultimately, God is the One who knows it. He is the One who shows you who you are.

So here are some things I found in the book of Matthew that you can do to dive into Him and exchange that tangle of lies and doubts the world throws your way for a life of joy and purpose:

Serve.

Matthew tells us, “Do you want to stand out? Then step down. Be a servant. If you pull yourself up, you’ll get the wind knocked out of you. But if you’re content to simply be yourself, your life will count for plenty.”

It also tells us this about Jesus: “He came to serve, not to be served.”

If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself. 

But if you forget about yourself and look to Christ, you’ll find both yourself and Him.

Look up. Serve. The brightest lights don’t need a spotlight.

Love.

Matthew tells us, “Love others as well as you love yourself.” 

“Don’t be in such a hurry to go into business for yourself.”

Love never gives up. It never loses faith. It is always hopeful. It endures through every circumstance. God intended for us to love with all we have. That means loving Him and all of those around us.

Ask.

In Matthew, Peter asked Jesus, “Who do you say I am?”

Jesus was delighted that Peter had actually gone to Him for the answer. He replied, “... and now I’m going to tell you who you are, really are.”

So often we go to Instagram or Google to try and discover things about ourselves. We take the pieces of others and try to create some sort of image for ourselves that resemble those pieces. But God wants you to go to Him. To ask Him. To dig into His Word. To seek truth.

To find life.

Simplify.

The book of Matthew poses the question, “Do you have any idea how silly you look, writing a life story that’s wrong from start to finish, nitpicking over commas and semicolons?”

I don’t know about you, but that verse hit me hard.

We can get so caught up in the ending details of the stories we write for ourselves that we miss out on the chapter God is writing for our lives today.

Let Matthew remind you, “Give your entire attention to what He is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”

Believe.

Jesus speaks this truth in Matthew: “Become what you believe.”

Dig into the Word of God, and believe the freeing truth that you read. Believe that God is moving in your life. And believe that you have a purpose. Believe that God is using you. Believe it even when you don’t see it. Even when it doesn’t feel like it.

I know it’s easy to lose yourself in the noise, but my prayer for you is that you can find yourself in Christ. That you can serve. And love. And ask. And simplify. And believe.

Keep this verse close to your heart today: Ephesians 2:10 “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

Trust in that.